The Internal Dialogue of a Parent on New Year’s Eve

 

NYElarge sze

  1. It’s New Year’s Eve – we should totally go out.
  2. We can’t go out – damn kids.
  3. It’s fine, we can stay in and party.
  4. And by ‘party’, I mean have a takeaway and drinks at home.
  5. In my pjs.
  6. We should go wild and have a fancy takeaway. It’s New Year’s Eve after-all.
  7. Stupid New Year’s Eve – any decent takeaway will take hours to deliver.
  8. Ok, we’ll have a kebab. With chips. And burger sauce.
  9. God, I must go on a diet from tomorrow.
  10. Maybe not tomorrow, but definitely from Monday.
  11. Is that footsteps I can hear on the landing?
  12. GET BACK IN YOUR BED!!
  13. That kebab was amazing, I’m stuffed.
  14. I reckon I could squeeze in a small piece of chocolate.
  15. Now I feel sick.
  16. Maybe another glass of prosecco will help. The bubbles might just balance out the sugar-rush.
  17. Nope, still feel sick.
  18. It’s only 9.30pm…will I even make it to midnight?
  19. Must make some resolutions for tomorrow.
  20. I’ll make them in the morning when I feel less sick.
  21. God I love my sofa and tv.
  22. Fabulous view of the fireworks.
  23. Everyone looks like they’re having so much fun!
  24. Happy New Year everyone!
  25. Maybe we’ll go out next year.
  26. As long as I can wear my pyjamas.